Why Sleep Training is Hard for Mama | Sleep Training
Sleep training is a lot harder for me than I thought.
This past weekend we started “sleep training” Clyde. For a long time, we didn’t see any need in ever having to do that since he has been an amazing sleeper since day 1 and always slept through the night.
But.. sleeping through the night wasn’t our goal with sleeping training.
Our goals include:
- Fully transitioning Clyde to his own room to sleep during the night and through naps
- Clyde being able to independently put himself to sleep aka not nursing to sleep
- Me being able to have some extra time on my hands and sanity from not constantly nursing him to sleep 😅
As soon as he was asleep that first night I was so happy and EXCITED to have some freedom and time to myself. Then by night 3, as we took his bassinet out of our room for good, it hit me. It hit me HARD.
I was suddenly so full of emotions and mainly so sad to not have him right next to me. Thinking about it, I had him next to me or inside my tummy for the past 15+ months every single night. I was so caught up in the exhaustion and frustration from CONSTANTLY nursing him to sleep, that I didn’t even think about how hard this new transition would be for ME. I immediately had feelings of “look, he fell asleep all on his own, I’m so proud of him” to “I guess he doesn’t need me anymore” “he DOES need me, that’s why he cried so much tonight” “I’m a terrible mom for letting him cry” etc etc etc.
As I sat there confused by all of my own thoughts, cried, and told Caden what I was feeling.. he reminded me that it’s OKAY to feel this way. It’s OKAY to be sad that Clyde is growing up and will learn to do things without me. It’s OKAY that we have to teach him these things and sometimes it takes time (and more and more time!) And most of all that he will ALWAYS need his mama, no matter what, just like I still need mine.
If you’ve made it this far.. I just want to say that:
1—being a new mom requires patience with yourself and faith that you’re doing the right thing.
2—you need a support system. I’m lucky enough to have a husband to support me through it but I also know it is SO possible to do it without a partner too (shout out to all of you single parents—my mom did it and remembering that gives me so much strength)
3—It is always okay to put YOUR mental health first. Happy mom, happy kids, happy life.
4—no matter how fast those little ones grow up, YOU will always be their mama. ❤️
