Archives for April 2019

February 24th

Today was the day. It was our due date! I woke up practically screaming with excitement that the day had finally come! Caden and I went about our day like normal and just waited for some big moment to happen.. but it never did. That week we had done everything that everyone and their great aunt’s cousin’s neighbor did to induce labor (walked tons, ate lots of pineapple, curb walked, sex, walked even more, ate allll the spicy things, bounced like nobody’s business on a yoga ball for hours on end) … and nothing.

March 3rd

Today was induction day!! We had to wait until “between 8-10pm” to be called when a room was ready for us. So we spent the day packing all the last-minute things (which was WAY too much) I showered and got ready, we cleaned the house one last time and waited. I hadn’t heard anything by about 6:30pm so I called them and they said to be there by 7:30! We were THRILLED!! That hour went by so fast and before I knew it we were in the car, hospital bag(S) and car seat in the back and on our way to have our first baby. We listened to our fave Dan + Shay song and sang the whole way there. We were so ready.

Once we got to labor and delivery, checked in and into our room, we took my last bump picture (and maybe a few selfies in the bathroom (;) and then met our Nurse Mindy. She got me my IV and all that jazz and started my induction by giving me a Cytotec to soften my cervix and cause me to start feeling contractions. Up to this point I was at a 1 and 80% effaced.

The rest of the night was spent bonding with our nurse over the fact that the hospital didn’t allow sugary drinks, (diet coke is NOT like the real thing!) watching Wonder on Hulu, slow dancing, eating saltines and trying to get some sleep.. which we got about 2 hours of due to our excitement and the fact that I had to be checked/given another dose of the meds every 3 hours.

March 4th

My new nurse and doctor checked for progress and said I was still a 1 and threw me a bone and said maybe a 1+. I felt so defeated at that point. The next step was Pitocin. That started at 7:45am and they upped the dose every 30 minutes. I started to feel more contractions at this point but they were still tolerable and 2-3 minutes apart.

I needed some comfort so my grandparents came and my grandpa and Caden gave me a blessing. Soon after at 10:30am my doctor came in to break my water! The actual breaking itself was uncomfortable and felt weird but literally seconds afterward was pure hell.

My contractions immediately spiked and were a level 90 on the monitors and happening every 60 seconds. I felt so out of control of my body at this point and it was honestly terrible. I was so overwhelmed with pain and emotion! Caden helped me to the bathroom and as we were in there I told him that I definitely needed the epidural and he told me he had forgotten the safe word for when I actually needed it. Pretty sure he got the hint though with how much pain he saw me in. Suddenly my nurse runs in and starts hooking up my monitors again and as soon as she did the two charge nurses came running in. Before I knew it I was being tossed in bed and turned side to side. My baby’s heart rate was dangerously low and with each of those strong contractions seconds apart, it dropped lower and lower.

They turned off Pitocin and everything seemed to get a little better. The anesthesiologist was in an emergency surgery but luckily there was another on duty so by 11:35 I was able to finally have an epidural. That immediately helped me feel much better (even though it only worked on one side) and by 12:40pm I finally got to a 3.5, then by 2pm I hit a 5.

At 4:20pm they started me back on a low dose of Pitocin because I was stuck at 7cm. That took me to an 8.5 by 4:50 and I was at a 10 by 5:45! We were all SO excited when my nurse told me that I had made it to a 10! My doctor was now at a different hospital delivering a baby, so we called in another doctor (Dr. Black) so that I could start pushing.

All of the adrenaline and excitement and pain and every emotion all caught up to me at this point because the end was finally in sight! I started to push at 5:52 and once I got the hang of it, I absolutely loved pushing. At this point my epidural had really worn off and I could feel each contraction. Although it was slightly painful, it was nothing like I had felt earlier in the day and I really enjoyed being able to feel when I should push each time! We continued pushing until 7 pm. At this point I knew things weren’t going as planned.

Dr. Merrill (my doctor) was back at this point and him and Dr. Black were off to the side talking. I just remember seeing them talk and hearing the nurses whisper about if they should start getting “the room” ready. As I sat there shaking and crying even more so than I had previously, every fear possible flew through my mind. Was Clyde okay? Was I going to be okay? What was going to happen? Why isn’t my body working? What did I do wrong? Everything.

My doctor tried to have me push one last time before he sat down and told me that for whatever reason my baby was not progressing down the birth canal and was not handling the contractions well enough to continue trying. He explained it as if Clyde was swimming for 2 minutes and then being held under water for 45 seconds repeatedly. He told me that a cesarean was the best option and asked me if I was okay with that. In that moment I broke down with fear and signed the consent forms. I knew that this was the best and only option for both of us.

Seconds later Caden was handed a jump suit and a hair net, I had a hair net on, and we were being wheeled into the operating room.

The operating room was probably the part I remember the most from the day. My Dr. started the Dan + Shay Spotify playlist for us, someone got me a warm blanket because I was shaking so bad, and they got started. Caden stood to my left and watched the entire thing.. which if you know him, you know that probably wasn’t a great idea. But no worries, spoiler alert– he did fine, until days later. Haha! I told Caden not to tell me what he was seeing unless I asked/until he saw our baby.

After what seemed like forever (31 minutes) Caden told me he could see Clyde and that he was doing great! I knew he was lying because everyone was quiet and there were no newborn screams. Seconds later, Clyde was over to the side at the little baby station surrounded by his team of doctors and nurses. Caden followed and stayed with him the rest of the time. After suctioning out his lungs, we FINALLY heard him cry! I had never felt more joy in my life than hearing that first cry. It was then that I immediately felt at peace and that everything was going to be okay. Everyone cheered with joy and told us we had a “red-head just like his dad!” We were shocked but I was so excited because I had always wanted a red head.. even though Caden is positive he’s actually blond. (;

We then learned that the reason everything was happening the way it did throughout the day was because Clyde had his cord wrapped around his neck THREE times. If that wasn’t enough, he also had a “true knot” (knot in his cord) which is extremely rare. With this knot, it made it so that once my water was broken, the knot was getting pulled tight during each contraction and later he was essentially bungee jumping in the birth canal. That little man is such a fighter! After everything was no longer sterile, all of the nurses and doctors had their phones out taking pictures of his cord because they couldn’t believe it.

Caden stayed with Clyde as they took care of him and got him cleaned up and weighed. I continued trying to see him from across the room and occasionally caught a glimpse of that red hair of his.

After I was all stitched up, I returned to my original laboring room where our families were waiting. I was in much better spirits than they had last seen me in and was cracking jokes as I weaned off of the meds they put me on. Haha. It was there that I told them everything that had happened and was able to hold my camera and flip through all of the pictures that Caden and the cutest nurse had taken for us! This was the best moment because this was also the first time I was really able to see him and his adorable, swollen face and tiny features!

Along with everything else, Clyde also had a lot of fluid in his lungs and because of that had some respiratory problems and had to be on a CPAP machine to help him breath.

He was sent to the special care nursery where he had to stay overnight. Caden continued to stay with him and I was finally able to join them by midnight! We still couldn’t hold him or anything but sitting there as our new family of 3 is one of my greatest memories. Even with him being hooked up to a bunch of things that I had no idea about, I felt immense peace, happiness and even more love for him! I sat with Caden as he told me about how heartbreaking it had been to sit and watch him throughout the night and not be able to do anything, or how panicked, lonely and scared he had been. But as we sat together all of that went away and seriously our entire world was there in that room. NOTHING else mattered and we were the happiest (and most exhausted) we had ever been.

Finally as the craziest, best, hardest, scariest, most joyful day of my life came to an end.. by 1:50am I was able to nurse him/hold him for the first time! What an amazing feeling. I didn’t stress at all about the fact that I had no idea what I was doing, or that I still couldn’t quite feel my legs, or that I hadn’t eaten anything in well over 24 hours.. it just felt perfect. He was so tiny and fragile and perfect and mine. I felt so in love and empowered. We were officially a family of 3 and we couldn’t be happier!

If you made it this far.. you might as well watch our birth video too!

Video by: BaiVisual